When Black Moon Lilith and the North Node meet in a synastry chart, the effect is intoxicating and immersive. Whether the aspect is a trine, opposition, or anything in between, you will feel strongly as if your relationship is fated. So if you see the North Node and Lilith in aspect in synastry, what do you need to know?
· Your meeting was fated. This is a whirlwind aspect, the kind where you are struck by a thunderbolt and your world just stops. There will be an intense feeling of recognition between you as you realize that, at least in this moment, this is your person. You are brought together to work through Lilith pain and in so doing find your true self and path in life. This relationship will be a winding, tortuous road with a brilliant treasure at the end.
· Old habits die hard. As much as this relationship pushes you to grow and go beyond your comfort zone, it can also leave you exhausted. And when that happens, there will be a tendency to fall back on old habits. You may hide or deny some aspect of your relationship. The North Node person may be tempted to conceal the relationship altogether. Either way, taboo is a difficult thing to confront day in and day out, so make sure to take breaks and focus on other aspects of the relationship.
· Build, build, build. Because we’re dealing with the North Node, there will be constant effort. The North Node is the place we are least comfortable, yet the place we must work toward. With this placement, the North Node person’s partner is constantly triggering these feelings while bringing in their own darkness and complications through Lilith’ influence. This is a difficult combination. And the only true way around it is through. So keep building.
While of course you would have to look at the whole chart to get a sense of the totality of the relationship, this aspect will undoubtedly pack a punch. With the North Node and Black Moon Lilith together, you’re guaranteed a near-fated, intense , and potent relationship that will keep both people working and becoming better every day.
Do you and your partner have the North Node and Lilith in aspect? What is it like?
My NN in Aries squares my bf’s BML in Sagittarius. Our connection is intense and does feel fated, but we struggle with balance. I often feel like I do everything for him with little reciprocity and end up feeling resentful. I know he loves me deeply, but I feel like he puts his own needs first while I am very couple-oriented. Some of the time, I’m okay with this, but in times of high stress (like most of 2020), this stuff rises to the surface. I’ve been doing less for him as a way to strengthen my boundaries, but it’s so hard since I tend to fall back into my Libra SN.
how big of an orb do you use for this aspect?
I use 10 degree orbs for nearly everything. Though in this case, given that both Lilith and the nodes are mathematical points rather than actual physical bodies, I think it is reasonable to tighten the orbs a bit. I would recommend 6-8 degree orbs here, but if you have something farther out that still resonates, there’s no reason to discount it.
My NN and my crush’s BML are conjunct with a half-degree orb. And, using your orb suggestion, we’ve got a double whammy, with his NN sextile my BML with a 4-degree orb. (I used to think that was too far apart, but I guess a sextile at 4 degrees is OK?)
I know this relationship is fated, and I’m pretty sure he thinks so too. It feels very karmic.
There’s been so much growth for me. Not angry feminine growth, though. Instead, my spirituality and connection with the numinous has just taken off because of this relationship.
On his side, I know that I have occasionally inadvertently triggered jealousy/feelings of inadequacy in him, just by being who I am. (This hasn’t had anything to do with other men, but rather because of skills that I may possess.) So this relationship has been growth-inducing for him, too.
I’d like this relationship to become a romantic one, but he has other commitments, so it may never be more than it is now. But it really has been life-changing for me.
I was the NN and ex was the bml, a 3 deg conjunction. Nevermind this aspect, we had the ugliest synastry and composite I’ve ever seen. I’ve mentioned somewhere else in here on synastry, all the red flag aspects, all the difficult aspects you can think of, there were there all of them. A wise man once told me ‘ girl, when transit pluto hits your ascendant, it also hits your descendant, don’t be such an idiot.’ Oh well, no one told me and I had no idea back then. Fatedness. Learned a few about relationships from this one difficult experience.
Midara, would inconjunct aspect count? We have exectly 150 degrees aspect. My Lilith at 12 degrees aries, his NN at 12 degrees Virgo. Meeting and falling in love certainly felt fated and now more then two years later we love each other more then ever but syncing our completely different characters is getting harder and harder.
Like Occhinery wrote in times of high stress it’s more challenging then ever. I’m constatly fighting with myself of how much I should complain or disapprove when his choices are clashing with mine. I’m trying to bite my tongue and that isn’t working very much being scorpio rising and trying to control the situation too much. ?
His BML is conjunct 3° to my NN.
I don’t know if I should consider that we have a fated relationship, but it is something I never would have imagined, meeting someone from another background and (nearly) out of nowhere – both working freelance in an agency.
But, both Leos (not same year), both Merc in Virgo & Venus in Cancer. I think it’s a pretty good base.
We complement each other at work, and the rest is a sort of friendhip. Now that I think of it, it must be rather uncommon.
We have a sextile between my LIlith and his North node. He does seem to be scared of this more than I am. And he totally keeps me secret. 😀
Very interesting again … please write a lilith book!!! Can’t find much at all on lilith conjunct partners south node?!?
My business partner’s BML conjunct my South Node with orb 1,my BML conjunct his North Node with orb 1 too. Also his bml opposite my sun, and my bml trine his moon.
Among other wild aspects.
I still feel i am drawn towards the person and vice versa. We try to deny, and also make statements, but it comes up always e.g. in weird forms of saying words in a mistaken way that contains sex. It is sensitive as I do not want to mess up my business like.
But it’s there approaching 24/7…
Can bmlilith and sn/nn double whammy synastry be a sign of this?
Welcome, X!
That sounds like classic Lilith/Node energy. Sometimes it feels like fate takes the wheel. The problem is when it feels like it’s steering you off a cliff!
I’d take time to reflect on what those feelings are and what they mean to you. Lilith has a way or bringing long-buried needs and desires to light, even if they way it happens isn’t especially comfortable. Look at this as a gift and opportunity to know yourself even better. Good luck! <3
My business partner’s bml conjuncts my south node with 1 orb in leo (as well as his MC, while my sun conjuncts his ic exact), and my bml conjuncts his North Node with 1 orb in virgo, 12th house.
we have some saturn as well… his saturn trines my venus (chart ruler) 2 orb, my saturn inconjuncts his pluto (chart ruler) exact, and my saturn conjuncts his descendant, his moon and sun, therefore su/mo midpoint in his 7th house. He is a TAU with SCO asc, I am an AQU, with LIB asc. His mercury, venus (opposite my ascendant exact), mars in my 7th, my venus, mars in his 2nd (secondary seventh house) his pluto in my 1st (secondary seventh house), his sun and moon in my 8th, my sun in his4th, my moon in his 11th…. our venuses square 3 orb, our marses trine 2 orb, and our venus-mars is double whammy square/trine
we have chiron/venus dw -trine andconjunct, we have venus/moon opposite, venus/neptune trine, venus/jupiter trine, moon/jupiter sextile
His narcissus and my echo asteroid conjunct.
….and many moore.
we both were seriously abused i childhood, and both have c-ptsd (him narcissistic, paranoid, and borderline) we both codependent.
I him online 2,5 years ago, but we were around each other for 14 years.
All consuming, horror movie, but is án addiction.
I wrote áll the above as I have no idea why we have such intensity as we never had sex with each other, and he is explodes if I wear something that shows my sziluette, he becomes furious with me and storms out of my flat, shouts at me, gives me the silent treatment for days… other days he would mis-say words to imply a sexual meaning.
I am stuck, trapped, try to move on, and I wake up during night, he is making love to me.
I would really like if our friendship and business partnership worked. we have joint ownership of our company.
I have no idea which of the above implies I feel I always knew this soul, and the feeling from my side that we belong together, as he is extremely hostile one day and cooperative the other… our mercuries sextile exact as well.
What is your intuition on the above?
looking at a composite chart for someone no longer on this plane. feel to the core that we are a twin bond of sorts. much other bizarre synchronicities, symbols, and conjunctions throughout all of our charts and in composite. I am curious what you might think, in such a context, of Lilith conjunct north node in pisces (7’47 and 7’27) in composite chart, with Saturn in Pisces, and Pisces beginning 8th house at 10’44, though north node in 7th…
Welcome, v!
thank-you for the welcome Midara! 🙂
I’m only 17 and I’ve found a deeply rooted past life connection. BML, moon, and mercury conjunct NN. Then it’s squaring Neptune. All In the 7th house.
We’ve lived closely together, 3 houses away, and never met until this year. Not to mention we’ve both lived in this area for 8 years! We had shared friends before knowing each other and we both had very similar life experiences. Our ascendants are closely together. Him 26 degree Libra, me 6 degree Scorpio.
The way we met: my ex bf was going to move closer to me because we were long distance. Then ^HE shows up and cancels the whole show. We both were cheating on our partners with each other. Then we decided to get together! Once.. we had phenomenal s** and I saw him in multiple past life’s doing the same exact thing (having s** with me). I did call upon Lilith before this, she drank all of the wine lol. I love him, even though we both bring out the worst and the best in each other. We both have considered leaving each other because it has gotten very intense. He feels like my other half when I see past my ego. We challenge each other and are growing constantly.
My Lilith in Scorpio in 5th house conjunct his North node. I met him while in a long term relationship. It was an affair – is that Lilith? And 5th house? House of affairs/LUSTY energy. His north node meaning it was fated/destiny? The connection was intense, deep, got sexual but very obsessive, addictive. Eek Lilith.
My black lilith is 4 degrees Taurus and exactly on my husband’s north node at 4 degrees Taurus. He did keep me a secret for years when we dated. I finally made myself known. We have been married 25 years now. My black lilith is also conjunct my north node in Aries alhough a different sign it is conjunct.
Not only are both of our N.N.’s in sextile with each other, but my Lilith is in conjunction with his N.N. And his Lilith is sextile my N.N.!!!
We met 4 years ago and from the beginning, we have both felt the intensity, magnetic attraction, telepathic and intuitive connection, synchronicities and overall sense of fate and destiny.
We haven’t ever been in an official, clearly-defined (or “public”) relationship, as there was complicated 3rd party interference about 5-6 months into our (non)relationship. We were still in semi-regular contact over the next year or so (platonically), due to the circumstances of the 3rd party situation in which we were in social/group settings but one (or both) was involved with someone else. Then there was complete separation and no contact for almost two years. Throughout the entire time, regardless of 3rd parties or how far apart we were/how long it had been since we had physically seen or spoken to each other, the energetic and psychic connection never cut off.
I was able to “feel” him regularly, and I experienced increasing amounts of signs and messages that were clearly and directly about him —(suddenly his name was in multiple tv and radio ads that would be blurted out at a louder volume than the regular programming; the tiny, unheard of town he was born in across the state was referenced by name; my phone glitched and randomly showed his contact photo linked to the phone number of the 3rd party that I was involved with— even though we hadn’t communicated in months…it goes on and on.)
We both “coincidentally” ended our other relationships within two days of each other in mid September of last year, without any conscious knowledge about it at the time. We have been back in communication and seeing each other somewhat regularly since December (he works out of state most of the time), but there are definitely fears and wounds being triggered and complications with open communication and commitment that are causing conflict and delaying the progress towards healing that I know we can help one another with…
There is definitely a “twin flame” vibe to this connection and as I’ve started looking into the N. Node synastry, it seems like these are the aspects of such a relationship….
Our NN conj Lilith is 1.17 orb in Libra in the 12th house. We recently got serious abt each other. She lives in Malaysia and I in California. We have some other great aspects Moon trine Venus and Venus trine Venus. Anyway, the Libra part looks perfect, but the 12th house? We are in for a thrill ride! I’m about to go to Malaysia in 2 weeks. We were friend on FB for 8 years while I was married, then my wife ran off. I’ll have to get back to you on how it turns out, but now we love talking and chatting with each other, and each others dirty jokes. 😉