Destroying Your Ex Won’t Do You Much Good

When people break off a relationship, it’s common they want to take something from their ex. They may want to take their money or take their reputation or whatever.

They mistakenly believe that if they take a person down, they will go up. But it never works that way because life is not a zero-sum game.

You’re better off to brainstorm win/win scenarios. Transcend any tendency you have to try to take someone down so you can go up, because your effort is likely to have the opposite effect!

Even if you do take someone down, where does that leave you?  Down with them, most likely!

I specialize in helping people get on track so they can be successful in relationships. It’s been a constant focus on this blog. People have so much trouble is this area – why? Is it your chart?

I don’t think it is.  Well, you have to deal with your chart and your conflicting impulses; your complexity and theirs but I still don’t think that’s it. I think you’re setup to fail.

Yes, there is a lot of money to be made when people are lonely, isolated and miserable.  At this point, I am astonished at the depth of the sabotage aimed at the every day man or woman out there. I have come to understand this, deeply, courtesy Pluto’s transit through my 12th house.

If you feel you need your head untangled on this issue, I can help.

6 thoughts on “Destroying Your Ex Won’t Do You Much Good”

  1. Without planning it, I ended up doing this to someone with their reputation and relationship. For a long time I felt the Universe planned it to help me get back at them. I didn’t plan it. I felt good for awhile but because I told myself, it was their Karma. But now I wish it hadn’t happened that way, that I could just have been adult enough to not get involved with the person in the first place because it was crazy to. They didn’t want me that way and I couldn’t accept it for some insane reason.

  2. ” I have come to understand this, deeply, courtesy Pluto’s transit through my 12th house.”
    I had a similar awakening with Uranus transit 12H after its square to Pluto 9H Cap through MC, 2015 on. Natal Uranus 8H Sag, Natal Pluto and Sat 7H scorpio. Awakening both regarding mundane affairs/institutions and on-on-one partnerships. I kind of loathe caps and scorpio types these days a bit, still…

  3. Not sure pluto transit is always gonna end up feeling like a win/win. It seems it’s sometimes necessary / inevitable for the ugly belly to be exposed or the raw truth to be said in order to process and level up. I mean, the phoenix does burn itself to ashes first…. thoughts?

    1. Win/win may not be possible. I’m really talking about people who become obsessed with destroying someone they say they once loved. It’s not becoming. You can also land in prison for it. It’s also a giant red flag for the next person you may be interested in.

      The phoenix burns themselves, boils in their pain until transformation occurs. This is different than ruining another human being or even trying to do such a thing. It always comes around.

      1. Yes. And you might be operating from the place that person took you to – for instance if that person abused or neglected you – then the obsession becomes “how can I make them feel what they made me feel”. Reminds me of the Stephen King novel, Needful Things, where everyone ends up destroying each other. How to re-empower without forcefully taking it back from the other…

  4. In my experience as an attorney, men usually want things to end amicably, while women are often bitter and vengeful…In one instance, still vengeful after the guy died…Avoid this! It will only hurt you, not the target of your hatred…

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