Dear Elsa,
I have been dating a lovely Pisces man and things were magical with us in the beginning. Having a Pisces mother, I know they are free spirits who need a lot of space – so recently when he started to pull back, I gave him space. But now it seems difficult to reconnect to him.
We had a peaceful, effortless, fun, loving connection and now it feels like he’s nowhere to be found – why? What should I do?
Libra
United States
Dear Libra,
I don’t know why this man drifted – details are scarce. We don’t know how long you knew him, or how long he’s been gone. We don’t know if he is a generalized flake, married to someone else, stumbled on something that turned him off, met someone else… we don’t know.
But your post is enormously revealing and I am sure there is something you can learn here. So I am going to focus on that and meantime, maybe the Pisces will come back with some more information.
I noted your thoughtfulness regarding what you feel your partner needs. But I am afraid I also detect – via your writing and your chart – that underneath the niceness, you want to control. In other words, if you do this… then he is supposed to do that. And he is not doing that. And this may be the reason why not.
And I don’t mean to say there is something wrong with being thoughtful towards your partner. You must be considerate of your partner. But to deny what is driving you… to deny that you have wants and needs… demands of your own… is like walking around with one eye open. And if you do that, you’re going to miss a lot. And I fear this is the case here. That is, this man had cause to want to escape but you can’t see it because you can only see how nice you are.
As far as what you ought to do, I would examine this. Because what you were doing – being a thoughtful humanitarian without a speck of shadow – did not work and in fact, it is more than a little suspect.
Good luck.
Oh, dearie me! Pisceans do not need space ….they ARE space. This is where they live (remember Neptune the nebulous rules Pisces).
I like the word “magical” girlfriend uses to describe the beginning of this relationship because Pisceans are full of it….magic that is.
There is something ephemeral and magical about them that keep one mesmerized.
In fact they are so “other-worldly” that it is difficult to carry on a real relationship with them. Girlfriend also says that she “feels” that he is nowhere to be found…..another famous Piscean trait. One minute they are right there on the ground with you and then you turn your back…or blink…and they are floating somewhere over your head speaking with the Gods. So I don’t find his behavior all that unusual……even with limited information about this relationship.
I suppose Girlfriend needs to ask him these questions. I would.
I wish her good luck and honest communications.
Holy mother of crap, where in that entire qustion asked by the Libra was there anything that is control?! Hell, when the Pisces pulled back, the Libra did so as well, the Libra didn’t try to force Pisces to stick around which would have been control. Pisces is mostly at fault here, Pisces should be communicating with Libra as to why he’s running off like he is, that’s really unfair to Libra and BAD in ANY relationship. Libra here seems thoughtful, Pisces seems to be acting immature.
OMIGOSH… how true! Lack of communication is the key!!!! I am currently so called dating a Pisces male, and I now constantly thinking of ways to break this off without the drama.
He is LACKING in communication, which actually started off the opposite-of course! We have been dating for 3 months, and he would call me every day, we would see each other once a weekend. He wanted me to spend the night at his place all the time.
Now, he is mute and doesn’t reach out to me, other than texting day to day (BORING). I need communication, and even brought this up to him, and he keeps putting this off.
I am to the point, where I am daydreaming about how to break up with him but I don’t want to hurt him badly, either 🙁 I just feel if he cannot talk to me about what is going on (the good and the bad), we will not be able to evolve much on “us”.
I really feel bad about where our relationship lies right now, because I really do care about him, alot. But, I am too the point where it’s draining me, because I am not getting it back in return verbally and emotionally.
Such is life 🙁
I think we’re dating the same guy. My story is, literally, identical to what I just read of yours. Errr…what to do? What to do?
As a Pisces, I really wanted more information from Girlfriend, because I came to the same conclusion as Elsa. She’s done what she was ‘supposed’ to do by him, so why isn’t he doing back?
Most Pisces I know, myself included, do not just disappear without some word of warning. The problem is that most people think we’re so flighty that they don’t take our words seriously and are so surprised when we come up ‘missing’ despite the fact that we told them we were going!
Yes, communication is always key and best in ANY relationship, but there’s so much missing from this question — time together, how long he’s been gone, what event, if any, precipated his pulling away (and hey, sometimes we pull back to see if you’re still holding steady to the line, we want to be wanted, too, and are far too often taken for granted!) — that I am simply left to wonder if there’s more to the story than just a fish floating off.
Just adding my two cents worth from Libra point of view . . . I lived w/a Pisces for 6 yrs, wonderful human being he was/is. However, the reason we parted ways had to do with subtle control issues on his part. He finally told me he was waiting for me to change into the person HE wanted me to be! Like that was going to happen . . . We had Moon opp Uranus/Uranus sq Moon in our synastry, so giving each other space was not the problem. In fact, it felt in many ways like the relationship dissolved (good Neptunian term) because we had too much space & freedom!
BTW – controlling thru “nice” behaviors is far more common than it would seem . . . just a variation on the tit for tat mentality. Expectations of certain behaviors is generally deadly to any type of relationship. 🙂
To Linsey…
LOL… Elsa obviously saw something in the chart to that showed a need to control. No biggie. Don’t we all need to control something in our lives? 😉
I excercise a lot of my control in my job trying to be a perfectionist. At home I am very laaid back and a rather poor housekeeper. Currently there are major issues at my work. The store is falling apart, and a total mess, almost beyond saving. I am feeling like I now need to clean my house so something is once again almost perfect (and clean and orderly) in my life. Too funny!
I am Pisces male most of the things i read here so true pisces are lazy in actions while libras are quicker and need quick responses by pisces. To all those pisces male and libra female I tell you what just patch up again if you have 1 remaining chance and libra female should work hard to stick pisces male into reality. Reality is everything dreams are nothing until they changed into reality. Pisces feels insecure that’s why they can’t tell everything to everyone. Don’t think wrong. Be positive and stay happy. As much i know, hey libras If you stick your pisces male with reality, Jokes & happy atmosphere. You are the winner OF ALL TIME. Libras females like to go outside all the time and want to friendship with everyone but please be sure not to talk with males as a close friend it will hurt pisces alot inside and they may go in dreams again which cause problem and change in behavior which you may be not like it. Most romantic relationship are of these twos. If you are libra female and like pisces alot just try this
(( WHAT DO YOU SAY ?))
Hello Elsa, your welcome!
I am looking for more comments .. Yoo I want to save some relationships between of these two, haha its tough, but god helps if you truely love someone.
Hello Elsa, your welcome!
I am looking for more comments .. Yoo I want to save some relationships between of these two, haha its tough, but god helps if you truely love someone.
This is an old post. If post your chart in the forum here: https://elsaelsa.com/forum/ with whatever questions you have, more people will see it and you’re sure to get a response. 🙂
hmmmm let me post there..
Hello Libra woman here!
I have had an on again off again relationship with a Pisces man for 1 year and a half. We had explosive arguments and passionate love making. Bottomline, once I realized he Truly loves me and he believed that I truly loved him, we have been almost mystical and magical together! A real powerhouse, he cures my indecisiveness, lets me be a lady and I let him be the man. I love not HAVING to be in control and letting him guide the ship so to speak. Only true love and compromise between two people can conquer the hard times in ANY relationship!
I am a libra women
He is a Pisces man
I really miss him.
I love him so much.
We started of our friendship with relationship it self. We started to be bf and gf and we decided to be husband and wife.
One day, I got pissed off at him for talking to another women
Second time, I got really angry on him for drinking too much
( he’ called me so many times that day) i told him m not in good mood talk to u tomorrow
From then, he is gone
I don’t know what I did?
I don’t know what happend?
I called him
I msged him that what happened.. I told him
“Even if it’s ur fault I said I m sorry”
Talk to me and tell me
For two days he told me I will tell u when I reach home…
He never reply
I sent him a msg next day – “what should I do” why r u doing this, what can I change for u… do u want to do friendship with me or in relationship with me…” he said “nothing can separate us don’t hurt me”
Then again,
I msg him he never reply till today
I really miss him… why is he doing this!
Will he be back to me?
I love him, I love his nature spirituality when he is with me life is so beautiful
But does he feels the same? He doesn’t seem to communicate with me?? He doesn’t seem to have feelings for me?
I don’t want to msg him now…
But my heart wants him please help me
Pisces man can very emotional and sensitive, so much so that he/she can be overwhelmed with their feelings. All they really need is an affirmation of your love for them–they want to connect with you on every level. They suffer from self-doubt and can get depressed when they feel they are taken advantage of…even if it’s not true. The most important thing to them is honest respectful communication. Hope this helps