Dear Elsa,
My husband, a Virgo, and I have been together for 10 years. The past year has been rough. I left him because I was unhappy and ended up after 2 months apart having an affair with a mutual friend. He started dating a woman. This went on for two weeks until we decided to get back together. That was 6 months ago, and since then he has left me for her and come back to me numerous times. I have done nothing in the past 6 months but try and repair our marriage and take my responsibility for the role I have played. I am also about 4 and a half months pregnant with our first child.
Now he says that he loves the other woman and is not sure if he loves me or is staying with me out of guilt. I don’t know what to do. Should I leave and make the decision for him that he seems to have so much trouble making for himself?
Double Aries
United States
Dear Aries,
I feel very sorry for you because with 5 planets in Aries all ruled by Mars in Aquarius, I am sure that patience is not a strong suit. However this is the dismal situation for people like you (and I am one of them). We can’t just leave! We think we can and we wish and hope that this is the case but what we find out is you can’t get out until you get out and I can tell you right now if that time had come you would not be asking me what to do, you would already be long gone. This said, it does not mean you have to stay with a man who is sleeping with another woman and if that does not make sense to you, I’ll explain.
You can leave. You can get your own place and you probably should. You can tell him not to contact you until he has come to decision and you should probably do that as well. Just don’t mistake this for being “out” of this relationship because that will not be the case.
You have a long history with this man and you have his baby growing inside your body so you are nowhere near done but yeah. If I were you I would get my own place, take some space for sure. And quit fighting with him while you’re at it. Believe it or not, he will probably miss that… as no one spends 10 years with 5 planets in Aries and doesn’t like the heat.
Good luck.
This definitely is a sticky wicket. However, since you both have dabbled with another person, that part is at least balanced. Much more difficult when only one has tasted new fruit.
Since you only have control over yourself, with five planets in Aries you have the opportunity to see if you are childlike or childish in those aries planetary areas. What better time than now to do some reflection. Also, mars is coming into squaring those planets so expect more sparks to fly. Hopefully you can gain some release, as well as, move yourself forward as the energy moves through.
Since saturn is hanging around your virgo partner, probably wouldn’t expect any closure on this situation until saturn makes its final pass over his sun. (have two early virgo friends who have ‘broken up’ with each other four times since saturn has hit upon their suns)
Good Luck
i’m really sorry to hear about your situation, double aries. ow! that is rough.
i think elsa’s advice is good. there is no way this can be sorted out while everybody is sitting smack dab in the middle of so many conflicting emotions.
i can’t really add much helpful to what she’s said, other than to say i’m sending some good vibes your way for whatever they’re worth.