It’s a shock when you realize you’ve come all the way back to exactly where you were. This comes to light in consultations sometimes. I’ll be talking with a client in the middle of a horrible Saturn transit. I’ll ask them to consider what happened twenty eight years prior.
The connections people make, sometimes right then in the moment are often breathtaking They realize they’re back in their worst nightmare. No wonder they feel so bad! They’re reliving something they thought they’d left behind forever. It’s magic, though. How could it not be?
My husband and I got married, twenty eight years after we didn’t get married as teenagers. You have to marvel at this stuff. It’s rarely anything you expect. Whatever I felt with my husband back then, I certainly never expected to feel it again. How our energies mix…
Or maybe you repeat something bad. I’ve had that happen too. 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007…these were horrible years for me. Like some kind of high-art-pain. Pain so deep, it’s exquisite.
They say that age brings wisdom. I think it’s true for most people, provided you don’t check out. And recognizing cycles like this are one of the reasons why.
You do something to someone. Twenty eight years later, it’s done to you. You think, oh! You see there is some order in the universe. Some intelligent design.
Maybe you don’t know what I’m talking about. But most of you have also had your private horror show. In other cases, it’s overpowering love that you feel.
Sometimes it’s both, simultaneously. And that right there is proof of God, to me. No human could ever design…any of this, really. How we come together, fit together and touch each other, across the years and across miles…before we’re born and after we’re gone. Sometimes, LONG after we’re gone.
If you’re suffering right now, and old enough to do so, think back to what was happening, twenty eight years ago. Try to make the tie.
If you’re too young to remember what happened, twenty eight years ago, then know that how you handle yourself, today, is going to count, twenty eight years from now.
You’re in a cycle right now, whether you realize it or not. It’s like being made up of DNA. This is true, whether you realize it or not.
When you start to think about these things, life gets a lot more interesting. It makes you want to see what comes next.
I can definitely see connections to 28 years ago. I was 14 then, experienced profound loss, was at the mercy of many, etc. Of course, being that I’m 42 now, I have way more control over my life. Much like then, my world is changing quite dramatically in a short amount of time. It’s surreal…as always.
Thank you :))
Oh, I was far too young to remember, but I’m trying to be a decent person now, when the hardships are here… Saturn return, these days is the last time it’s on the degree of my natal Saturn 🙂
Well, I was only 6-7 years old when Saturn was at this place… we (my parents and I) moved back to Ohio from Texas… which I did move back to Ohio (from Colorado) back in Feb during the first hit of Saturn opp of my Moon and conj my Uranus.
BUT, I have noticed a new saturn pattern that started 14-15 years ago starting to emerge. Back in 1999/2000 I met a man and started a romantic relationship with him with Saturn conj my Moon and conj his DSC… even though it ended (just too young) we continued to be friends. Then back in 2006/2007 when Saturn was squared this point in Leo our romantic relationship was “recreated” again for a couple years but I was still young (he is 7 years older than me) and I was out exploring the world (moved to CO)… well, him and I have always been close and our romantic feelings have been “recreated” again, but this time Saturn conj his ASC and opp my Moon… this time we are both adults and both in a different mind set… hopefully it turns out positive this time. LOL. Our relationship has always been Saturn influenced even including the 7 1/2 year age difference. lol.
Which is also funny… our prog natal to natal synastry has completely spelled out this pattern too when the energy between us transforms to more… first time pSun sextile nVenus, 2nd: pVenus squ nSun, and now pVenus trine Sun.
What is funny though… when I was living in TX the above said man was living in TX too… and moved back to Ohio around the time I did (but we didn’t know each other…). Saturn… sigh.
omg. I thought I was totally over a loss when I was twelve. I lead my life afterwards so confidently and bombastically like a Leo does….until Saturn transit Scorpio. I’m right back where I was when I was twelve. I was so young and heartbroken, I didn’t know what to do except bottle everything up at that time. I hardened (Saturn) myself and my heart up and lived through 4 years of depression. This time around, I was able to express my hurts, emotions, anger, rage, etc to people close to me, therapists, doctors, etc. It is painful yet magical renewal/healing that I never felt before. I can choose a better route for myself and not allow depression to eat me up again.
28 years ago I was reinventing my self and following my bliss. At this time in my life I am reinventing my life and following my bliss. I am elated. I was thinking on Friday that I fluctuate between Alice, Dorothy, Eloise and Hermoine. The adventure that is my life sends me on sudden journeys to distant, magical surreal worlds. Thank you for this wonderful blog. You answered a lot of my questions from last week. It’s a marvelous night for a moondance.
Loved ‘I fluctuate between Alice, Dorothy, Eloise and Hermione.”. I’m stealing that!!
“Sometimes it’s both, simultaneously. And that right there is proof of God, to me.”
Thanks for putting words to it, Elsa.
It’s not that I’ve not known dark despair. Love is also manifest–sometimes as rage, hope, anguish, a blinding flash of ‘eureka’–Love is always there.
Lovely, mystical post. 28 years ago was my time of pain so deep it was exquisite.
I will have to ponder more what the connection is with this time.
In non-astrological terms, it’s called going full circle! 🙂
Love, love this post.
28 years ago was awful. Work was awful, I was deadly depressed, plus bereft over the loss of my first best friend, home was hell.
I am missing my second best friend terribly now but remembering that time makes what is happening in my life now seem like a vacation in paradise. Work is fun, home is a sanctuary. Thankfully I’m not depressed like I was then!
28 years ago I suddenly landed in NYC after work disappeared in the mountain art village where I had lived, working for a friend in the city who helped me out significantly. Roll forward 28 years later, suddenly without planning I was laid off after 25 years at the same job, ended up back in the same mountain town and the old friend who helped me appeared out of nowhere after being out of touch for years and helped me get on my feet and gave me a job.
I was in my mother’s womb, on way to birth… And, everything besides that is a mystery, since I believe that either being offspring of an extramarital affair, or that adoption landed me in this family, and everything is covered up, and secret.
It isn’t my Saturn Return yet either. My Natal Saturn is 4-29 Sagittarius.
Transiting Saturn is about one degree, or so away from the House my Natal Saturn is in, which is he Third.
Maybe this thus makes sense that this is a relatively boring time, as I doubt things were very interesting in my mother’s womb.
But, if it’s true there’s a degree of a literal repeat of history, I might get to see it somehow unraveled if I really was adopted, or the child of an affair. That’s good news.
I probably have 1-5 years before a reveal of it would be made by Transiting Saturn… I don’t want to be left in identity limbo for another 1-5 years. If I was adopted, the woman I am to call Mother will be in very big trouble. If I have a different father alone, she still will be huge trouble still; though, she won’t be 100% severed ASAP, and won’t be pretended to have never existed. Because waiting until your child, whether adopted, or biological, is 30+ to let her know who she is, what she is, and where she came from over a personal desire to avoid personally being barely negatively judged at all for having cheated on her horrible husband she divorced when the said child was 18, or for having adopted a kid over difficulty having children… Is not acceptable. Her public image should not matter more to her than my entire life.
OMG! 28 years ago I was one year out of college, my life was a huge mess and I had a nasty habit of sleeping with people who were in semi-relationships. Never married, but also not completely available. So now, I finished grad school a year ago, my husband cheated on me and left and my life is a complete mess, but in a better way. Oddly enough, the cheating never bothered me as much as the way he has treated his kids, but boy is he in for in 28 more years. And him, well 28 years ago his first wife cheated on him and left him. But I have learned many lessons along the way, so hoping I won’t waste this transit.Saturn is sitting on my Virgo 5th house…guess I will learn to be chaste this time, lol!
@Reirin: I WAS that mother, (so to speak) extramarital affair, followed by pregnancy, later adopted my son out to ex-husband’s family, to move on to find love. 28 years later, oh my, my son is the most spiritual, forgiving person, we have a fabulous relationship!
Oh yes do I understand the circle of life & season & Saturn’s dealings in Scorpio. No regrets though, strangely enough it all worked out beautifully. (I can say that, “now”) 🙂
Thank you Elsa, such a potent post.
such an interesting post; in my life now is the man i dated at that time. we reconnected in june, had an incredible nite but because he is coming out of a marriage/bankruptcy divorce, he is not interested in a relationship. yet there is a very strong intimate bond there, we will see each other again in a few days as i am going to ny…the difference was back then he was a big drinker and he is now sober….
huh. i’m planning on doing the same thing to my kids my parents did to me 28 years ago. (uproot the family.) i hated it at the time but it worked out better in the long run.
Hah! I hope in 28 years I’ll be able to not fuck up my finances.
this year I”m completing 28 years since one of the most difficult years I’ve ever been through . . it feels like the cycle of suffering started back then is finally closing . . the feeling is that of exuberant feelings coupled with the quiet restraint of tough experience . . it;s scary to think it took me so long to get through this .. it feels good that I am moving on, at last! your posts about this cycle have been enlightening readings, offering tremendous help and insight . .
thanks!! 🙂
Beautiful!!!
It’s not just that we have a Saturn cycle but the progressed moon cycle is 27.5 years so the two coincide.
Said the other day that this time is reminiscent of the late 80s because of the transits. Back then Saturn was in my 8H Sag and prog. moon in 12H Aries as they are again. Uranus was in late Sag, now it’s in late Aries.
As a teenager I spent that time hidden away in my bedroom playing on a computer, occasionally getting drunk with terrible hangovers, and having given up on my education but not knowing what to do.
I’m back to doing the hermit thing but hopefully without the self-destructiveness. Waiting for the prog moon to get over the ascendant into 1H.
Twenty-eight years ago, I committed myself to a plan of action (I was 22), and I was cognizant of Saturn’s presence in my life. That many years later, I’m reaping the rewards of it though I still grapple with insecurity; it’s to make me work on it for a second round. These returns aren’t always to my natal Saturn but sensitive points in my life.
I reconnected by magic with a classmate from Europe (I’m in the States) 27 years after we had last seen each other. We were sweethearts as teens but not lovers. When we had seen each other again, it was as if we had last seen each other yesterday and picked up where we left off. Being with him for those few days really brought back lessons from our relationship’s natal Saturn which conjuncted his Venus in Capricorn; although it wasn’t a conjunction, my north node and 7th house is also in Cap. He was an amazing person, but he had a very timid heart when we first met and still did 27 years later; he admitted that much to me. I also saw a lot reflected back to me. It wasn’t crushing as Saturn can be (I was more concerned for him), but it definitely gave me a reality check and I could see my nature so much more clearly.
My mother died 28 years ago. Now, I am at the same age when she died. Where did the time go?
Also, my dating relationship and marriage, with my husband, lasted 28 years and 2 months.
This is a Saturn cycle story that has always blown my mind. I know someone who had not been married long when she became involved with another man. The affair faded out, she stayed with her husband and he never knew about it. Twenty eight years later she became involved with the same man. She left her husband this time, moved in with the other person and quite soon he left her. She eventually divorced and the second man is off the scene too.
Last time Saturn was in Pisces. I was planning my great escape from my abusive husband. Saturn went into Aries and I had the courage to leave. My Dad died then; it was square my Asc. My mom died when Saturn was conjunct my asc. Pluto was in Scorpio during these transits as well, moving across my sun and Saturn. My great escape now is to live in my Van and travel the USA. I have yet to get the courage to do it alone, however. Plus, I am needed at home now. Pisces is in my 4th house.
My mother passed in 2006. The few years up to and after I was dealing with my younger Pisces Sun opposing Pluto 4th to 10th sister’s manipulations of my parents to get control from me, the oldest, my parents had assigned matters to. It came to her physically attacking me after I informed my father of an important legal matter she didn’t like. Somewhere in there she said something about me slapping her when we were children. When I was 10 and Saturn was also in Pisces (I have Virgo Moon in 5th opposing Pisces Mars) my mother went to work making me responsible for watching my 3 younger siblings after school until my father came home from work. When Mom went from 2nd to 3rd shift in the summer it was my job to keep them from waking her up, which was a chore with the middle two. I probably hit her then. Anyway, I told her then to grow up and realize what it was like to have that responsibility at 10. That didn’t stop her from physically attacking me after. I’ve been done with her since 2014 after more family drama of her making.
Sorry, l have just read this and have to comment– my mother died in 2014. I was lied to about the will…so many similar things Wantina…so many. I wont repeat. I am the eldest and there were two younger sisters.
l did the unthinkable. l took them to court challenged the will and won. Havent spoken to the sisters since…and loving it!
Sorry to hear of your similar family crap. I consulted with an attorney and elder services. Little I could do with her manipulating my father to a shared POA with me, then she escalated a fight at what was then my youngest brother’s house that got my father and older brother under her roof. Both father and older brother passed a month apart in 2014. Just glad that I’d set up Dad’s prepaid funeral for him in 2006 after Mom passed and did what the will and law said with the remainder that she couldn’t get her hands on.
My sister was ‘given’ financial power of attorney…my mother died quickly (cancer) otherwise, she would have been ‘keep alive’ and my sister would have got control of the money…l would be homeless or dead. I made sure my mother’s end of life wishes were recorded by a nurse-l didnt like my mother, but l smiled when l heard my first boyfriend’s mother, who worked at the hospital, was there at her last breath
Lovely poetic, soulful post. Taking us back through peoples lived experience is very moving…and it teaches too.
28 yrs ago l had a hidden illness that took 4 yrs to diagnose…l was told it was all in my head.
I will look at those other years and think and reflect.
Dont stop writing your stories. Dont stop swearing even if you have to say f**K It it your voice.
I say this eventhough we will fight and disagree… sometimes.
Do you have Neptune in the 6th or had a Neptune transit 28 years ago with the hard to, not diagnosed illness? I have Neptune in the 6th and got the same tripe back in 1989. There’s more than the physical and psychological realms can find. Fortunately I snapped out of that to this day unknown illness with my own doing.
I have Neptune in the 9th, but Moon and Uranus in Leo in the 6th and Pluto in the 6th con Dec. in Virgo 1. I looked back to 1989…it was too much. I can only let it out in bits and pieces. I remember avoiding an unnecessary kidney biopsy and l did not follow the management plan for ME/cfs, which was recently stopped in the UK, but not where l live. Today there is are diagnostic criterias for this illness.It changed everything. Two books l found useful:’Eastern Body Western Mind. Psychology and the Chakra System as a Path to the Self’ by Anodea Judith. Uniting physical/pyschological/spiritual symptoms to give practical ways to work towards wholistic healing.One of the early ones to look at the effects of trauma. And ‘The Body is the Barometer of the Soul’ by Annette Nontill(sp?). In many ways l am healthier now than l was back then and l know myself better.
I Love the book by Nancy Noontil; Barometer of the soul. It’s truly amazing.
What helped me stabilize then, relieve symptoms pointing to vitamin deficiencies, was an astrology book I’d never really looked at on my shelf “The American Book of Nutrition & Medical Astrology” by Eileen Nauman. Some physical/psychological/spiritual trauma and healing work began and hasn’t stopped. This adapts one’s self wholistically to the cultural expectations outside one’s self rather than being adapted to continue to function within culture’s requirements. Glad your diagnosis was realized. To take time to know, take care and be with yourself is rare luxury.
Yes, l have it on my shelf too, but l haven’t really used it much. Might have another look today. When you point out ‘cultural requirements’ do you mean things like being a decent person? (Also things like paying bills). I never was a crowd follower. People make culture and change it too…although, many dont like change, esp. when it comes to sharing power, which might mean losing a bit.(l am thinking about the Spanish sports issue-change in such a machismo culture! I didnt think l would see it and it has a ripple effect too). I think that is what these last days of Pluto Cap.are really about. The top down type of power crumbling…it is not just the big corps and gov. it is more basic grass roots …cant we all stand side-by-side?
Pluto on my dcs and Saturn on 11th cusp opps Venus (sun ruler) doesnt lend itself to easy relationships. Aloneness was a great fear. Not now. For me it is a necessity…we make do because we have to. Limitations and other necessities being what they are.
Nice talking to you, Wanita. Be well. I hope you can find some self time today.
Have you got ‘Women who run with the wolves’ l gave my copy to a friend yesterday. Better be up and doing.
By culture I meant societal, not social, constructs which you address with Pluto Cap. We could stand side by side, accept, respect our differences and not require another to think or do as we do. I became comfortable in my introvert skin from it. The astrology in Nutrition and Medical Astrology is Uranian and over my head quite a bit. I read “Women who Run with the Wolves” when it came out. An oldie but goodie I’m about to read again is “The Soul’s Code: In Search of Character and Calling” by James Hillman. Nice chatting also, Dianne.
Yes, l have read James Hillman. I have a lot of post Jungians on my bookshelf. Books call, when a person is ready…l wasnt ready when ‘Women Who Run …’ first came out. I have read ‘The Gods of Change’ by Howard Sasportas (my fav. astro/pysch. writer) until covers fell off.
The body is a symbolic system too, Gabriella B. It is Annette, not Nancy( l checked) Noontil.
Old books on the Tables of correspondences from the esoteric tradition are also facsinating. Esp. if certain symbols/dreams/illnesses keep popping up. Another tool in the box to help work out what makes us tick.