“For one to expect or ask things of others that he himself, if asked, would not be willing to do or give, is the worst kind of arrogance.”
–Anthony Beal
Scorpio’s reputation for taking offense, and taking it to its highest level, is well-known. Heavily plutonian people can hold a grudge tighter than Jack Benny with a handful of nickels. They are also known to be the sign that will amputate a relationship without looking back. Why are they so deeply offended? In return Scorpio might just as well ask why people are so damned offensive.
Once you’ve set Scorpio’s jaw is there anything you can do to turn back the clock? Perhaps. But Scorpio isn’t Leo. Offend Leo and much of what you have on your hands is a perceived wound to their dignitas. While that may also be true of Scorpio, the meat of the matter is much deeper. While Leo may accept a humble apology, Scorpio needs something more: you must understand what you did, why it was terrible, and you must BE truly, truly sorry. Leo expects honor; Scorpio demands contrition.
Scorpio can smell hubris like a stinky sweatsock.
Genuine remorse and an offer of penance are necessary. Don’t bother a Scorpio with “I’m sorry if I hurt you.” They may just sock you in the face. Until you’re ready to own what you did and genuinely ask for forgiveness from a place of remorse, don’t bother. If you don’t understand what you did and have not internalized the reason you should never do it again, why should you be forgiven? Without understanding you remain a threat, as you may repeat your offense.
Do you forgive easily? What is your Scorpio/Pluto/8th house situation?
I’m afraid I have no time for unforgiving Scorpios – and I’ve met a few! We all get offended or even betrayed by people at some point in our lives. The trick is to work out WHY you’re so offended by said offence and work out a way of dealing with it that isn’t aggressive or passive aggressive.
I’d love to know what the key lessons for Scorpio are. Some of the posters her are seeking a way to rise above petty or not so petty grieviences (mention of the Phoenix Scorpio rising from the ashes). What was it Linda Goodman said about Scorpio – there are Scorpions, Grey Lizards and Phoenixes. It’s about time Scorpios learnt something about this and stop causing us misery!
This is why I wrote (OR IS THIS A STUPID QUESTION) “we all get offended of even betrayed by people at some point in our lives….and so on”. Well written Kate!
If Scorpio work this out he or she may find answers of quality that no one else can find easily. The sign has so much amazing qualities!!
Hi lieve Dorien!
Dag lieve vriendin!
I agree Dorien, about quality answers. I figured something out just today that’s been bugging me. It was why some abused or neglected children would go on to dote on those same parents. Where does the anger go? Trust me, it had to manifest somewhere. Eventually, it seems like they find someone innocent and unrelated to vent it on, as if they are in control of the abuse cycle now even though it’s not a conscious choice. I hope that’s not entirely off-topic. It is about forgiveness, control and finding the answers. I can forgive a lot easier if I understand the cause.
They go on to dote on those parents because it’s their biological program to make them survive. So simple. Although only few parents are abusive, there are also only few parents, who are really good parents. From there come most of the issues, which a natal chart describes. This explains also to where the anger goes. Most affected people get mental or psychosomatic illnesses. They often last for a lifetime. Often they also lead to the abuse of own children. This causes cycles of abuse. Those victims, who are more conscious, are likely to abstain from having own children. Also for myself a matter.
It is so complicated. When I think I know something: a couple of hours after that I can ask myself: Dorien…dummy, why are you so sure about this! Life is complicated and simple as well. The suffering of people is horrible. Suffering of animals as well. So often I think “still silence wiseacre”. 🙂
So well written, Satori and so true. Everytime I happen upon this post and re-read it, the truth strikes me anew.
forgive but not forget. i avoid letting people (including me) make the same mistake twice. though i have.
8th house aries. i have a bit of it. some in contact with pluto.
So very very true…i most likely wont forgive and never forget…I can move rapidly forward once I BELIEVE whole heartedly that someone is more damaging and more drama to have in my life , and less of a hemeroid out of my life ..they are simply dead to me.
Good morning, I would so much appreciate scorpio people’s advice on how to apologise to my fiance, who happens to be a corpio too.
To make a long story short, we live in different countries, so I was going to go and move their permanently.
For personal reasons I can not post here, I went through a traumatic situation which left me with flashbacks and nightmares.
I want to go to the country in question and apologise to my fiance, but, face to face will be so hard at first, because I am in a delicate state emotionally, still due to the traumatic situation I went through.
I know I can not force him to be with me, and I am terrified of losing him, not because I am emotionally vulnerable and I need him, but, because he is the man of my life we have a soul to soul and mind to mind connection.
I thought about calling him first and ask to talk, or maybe write a letter explaining everything and meet after a few days. I am so deeply sorry for letting him down, and I am afraid of being iced out.
I would appreciate so much scorpios help please on how to apologise to him, phone call, letter or face to face, in the first meeting. I don’t have a problem facing up to my faults, I have a problem taking the first step, because I am afraid of the reaction.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my comment, may you all have a beautiful day.
I live with a Scorpio. Im a Virgo.
It depends on his age.but myadvise is to look at his moon sign. It might give you a clue as to how to comminicate with him.
My advice is to apologize. Be up front about why you are wrong, what you determined to be why you did what you did and how you are going to try to resolve it. No histrionics. No teary weepy begging. He wont respect that.
I personally write or text because I am better at communicating that way.
He will appreciate your honesty and self accountability. Dont grovel. own your feelings and behavior. Tell him the ball is in his court now.you will accept his decision whatever it is. Then back off. Good luck!
Hi Hildegardes Girl,
I do appreciate your reply and advice, thank you ever so much.
I would love to apologise face to face, but, I am not in a good place emotionally at the moment, and I know I would start crying, so I will write a letter together with the birthday gift I bought him. It is not because I want him to forgive me because I will give him his birthday gift, it is because, when I bought it, I was in a very happy state and it brings wonderful memories to me. Then again, perhaps, if he forgives me, then I should give it to him, because he could see it as buying his forgiveness, which is not what I want at all.
I am truly sorry for what happened, and my fear comes from the typical scorpio icing out people. I have never felt like this about anyone else before, mind to mind, soul to soul connection.
I am an arries, moon in virgin and rising aquarius, so I am not your typical arries description.
Once again, thank you so much for your advice, it means the world to me.
I do have strong Pluto/Scorpio. I cant remember a time when Ive received an apology in the spirit of contrition. Not once. I think the whole transformation thing. I need to see that youve been transformed in some way by your actions.
I don’t want to go back to the way things were before the offense. That shits dead, done. I want to see you, see new facets of yourself through our interaction. Anything else is absolutely draining and suffocating to me. I gotta transform and if you stay the same, then I cant.
I amputated my best friend for this reason. She felt bad, but she didnt learn a damn thing from her transgression. I learned a ton, grew a ton from it. She wanted everything to go back to how it was. I couldnt do it, even though I love her. I have to honor that inner desire to constantly explore myself.
Hi Libra Noir,
Thank you for replying, I do so much appreciate it.
Yes, I totally agree with the transformation part and learning from it.
Would he see me actually going and wanting to strt a new life with him as a transformation, we are in a long distance relationship. I know that what happened will never happen again and I don’t have a problem owning and assuming my mistakes, my problem is how to approach him at first, letter, face to face or a phone call, he would never be violent to me, but I know he shuts down until he is ready to talk, so this is why I thought about a written letter first and then meet. Yes, it is the scorpio icing out, even after the apology that I am afraid of, because I don’t want to lose him.
I tell my scorpio straight out that writing helps me collect my thoughts. Since you are in a distant relationship its pretty reasonable. I would write it by hand. Even if you use the computer to type it out first(I do cause my mind races like water with words and I cant handwrite them fast enough).
I understand how you feel. I wish you the absolute best.
Hi Hildegardes Girl,
Once again thank you so much for the well wishes and the kind advice. I will not feel peace until I apologise to him and make a mends.