Dear Elsa,
A friend of mine (Virgo, Leo rising) has finally got to me. After knowing her for over a year, my infatuation has finally developed. We get along great, and have incredible energy and loads of fun. In addition to this chemistry, we share many interests, and complement each other very well.
Here’s the problem: she has never been satisfied in a relationship. Her strong personality and assertiveness creates a strong attraction, but makes the men weak in front of her – via either their lack of initiation and decisiveness. She fantasizes over having a relationship with a guy not acting in such a way.
Although I do not exhibit those negative symptoms she hates, unfortunately I am no more than a friend of hers. I am also a year younger than her, which does not fit into her fantasy of an older man who can take charge. As far as I am concerned, she would be lucky to have someone like me – I would be great for her. How can I convey this in such a way?
We are both quite extroverted and enjoy each other’s company. But it isn’t satisfying for me to simply stay this way.
Thanks,
Double Cancer
Dear Double Cancer,
It sounds like she wants a heat-seeking missile, and I can relate! However, I do not agree that you do not demonstrate the qualities she loathes… because you do. I mean, come on. You want this girl and you say you can take charge, but are you doing it? You’re not! Instead you are writing to an astrologer half-way around the world!
And this is fine, because I will kick your ass! 😉 See, I agree with everything else you wrote. Your chart handily trumps that of the average bear, but you’ve got to get your Mars in gear. Mars is how you get what you want. It’s how you hunt. And you are not hunting, you are merely wanting. So why is that?
Well I imagine it’s because your Mars is in Capricorn and as confident as you are, you are afraid you’ll be rejected! So what is the remedy to that? The remedy is to face your fear… and in the case of Mars in Capricorn, mow it down!
You want this girl. You know what she wants, and you know what she needs. You also know you have all of it and you have it in spades, so please get your ass and go get the girl. Er… and one more tip from one of her tribe, another strong woman:
For Godsakes, don’t “tell” her how great you’d be for her. SHOW her.
Good luck.
~~
Have a question? Need advice? Ask here!
Elsa’s right on (again!). When my husband proposed, he got down on one knee but he didn’t ASK me to marry him. He said, “I want you to marry me”. *giggles* This Virgo was delighted!
Once again Elsa does it. The best advice hidden in the midst of a “normal” day. Showing a woman how you’re wonderful for her… Those moments, those actions, are what she’ll think back on and ruminate about when she’s having a tough time in the relationship with you. It’s gold. – Thanks again Elsa!!
For godsakes, don’t “tell” her how great you’d be for her. SHOW her.
We could always use this!! WTG, Elsa!