I was talking to a gal I met online, in 2000. Yep. We’ve known each other for nineteen years. She told me she could understand why I wouldn’t trust anyone; I was surprised.
“But I do trust people,” I said. “I trust them, readily. If anything I am too trusting. I’ve been told this before. I’ve been told it recently.”
She said she didn’t trust anyone and I thought about it. “Well, I don’t trust people online anymore, I guess. On that front, I guess I really have been burned too many times. But as far as going out in the world, outside of having a bad feeling about someone, I’m inclined to trust everyone I meet…”
I thought of my grandfather, Henry. He taught me to treat everyone as if they were a good and kind person, up until they proved themselves to be “disagreeable”.
Disagreeable. That’s the word he used. Libra loves it.
I also thought of all the people who have betrayed me over the years and the fact of the matter is, I just don’t care. If you’re going to betray me, then betray me. I’m not going to worry about it. I realized as we were talking, my take on this is atypical.
I tie this to my childhood. So much happened to me before I was even eight years old, it’s just not possible for someone wanting to hurt me to come anywhere near what was done to me when I was young.
It’s like being burned by the heat of a one thousand suns. Then someone comes at me with their one sun or their half-a-sun – you’re kidding, right?
I suppose I could be super-sensitive and get “triggered” but that’s not what happens. I just think you’re stupid.
Astrologically, I give this to the Jupiter Uranus aspect in my chart. I have some unique, innovative doors I can get through. I’m very fast.
Do you react in ways that are typical or do something hit you in a quirky way?
“I also thought of all the people who have betrayed me over the years and the fact of the matter is, I just don’t care. If you’re going to betray me, then betray me. I’m not going to worry about it.”
Sounds 12th house-y, like you’ve transcended it. You don’t exist to me anymore, poof! And like a Neptunian cloud, they dissolve, and disappear!
Well, that’s true too. It’s a big world and you can focus on anything.
I also have Uranus-Jupiter, in a less than one degree conjuction, in Sag. I wouldn’t know how to answer. I guess that might mean I am unpredictable. I have Uranus/Jup trine my Mars in Aries and also trine my Leo Asc. I think when it comes to asserting myself, I am fast. I think I would have made a great martial arts fighter, but I care too much about my face. When someome starts a fight with me (in person), god I feel sorry for them. Lose is not in my vocabulary. If something is important enough to me, I will find a way to win, and I am confident…certain… about it too. I think in that way I am formidable and possibly unique (uranus) in this regard. I can also detach from conflicts like this in the blink of an eye. Like I hate you today and it’s nothing to me tomorrow. I think this is more the Uranus/Jupiter square Merc… I don’t like poisoning my mind with hate…hate is an attachment…so i have to clear it out to have more space in there to think freely.
I see the Jupiter Uranus aspect, particularly the opposition, as a leadership aspect. Everything you have just wrote about yourself seems to confirm it, Elsa. You trust people, but are not worried about betrayal, because you have found ways to minimize damage and regain footing very fast, in your words, “the unique innovative doors that you can get through very quickly”. I think the “flip side” of this energy dynamic is that this is the sort of leadership that attracts enemies, particularly in a female nativity, but the very energy of the dynamic keeps the native a step ahead of the enemies. It’s a highly valuable aspect for anyone engaged at war. I guess the ultimate question is – how does one channel it toward a higher good (Jupiter) in times of stability and peace (not necessarily Uranus).
“I guess the ultimate question is – how does one channel it toward a higher good (Jupiter) in times of stability and peace (not necessarily Uranus).”
What immediately comes to mind – I am able to hold am astrology chart (Uranus) in my hand and nearly, instantly, answer a question or advise a person, anywhere in the world.
This detachment also allows me to publish this blog. My ass, hanging out here, ’round the clock, for nearly twenty years. If you moved a few hairs on my head (or a planet in my chart), this would not be possible.
But can you easily trust and protect yourself at the same time? How do you do that? (General you, no one in particular here.) Distrust breeds fear and fear is necessary for survival. In fear, I establish boundaries. That’s how I feel safe. It’s not the threat of action that scares me, go ahead and throw your best shot. It’s the vulnerability of exposing my tender center, of breaking my heart. Maybe like any abused creature, trust is hard earned. Superficially, social trust is easy, it’s easy to be kind and considerate in general (without exposing my own vulnerabliities). But letting someone in all willy nilly. Ha! Natal pluto in the first. Not gonna happen.
I have always liked the way Henry used words. Disagreeable. Perfect.
That’s why Scorpio comes after Libra.
Just on my way back to home I was thinking about an ex. and the pain I had and was wondering the same ” nothing can hurt me more than he did”.
For the record i have Jupiter square Uranus (4th pis/1st sagi) and transiting jupiter is conjunct my natal Uranus (1 degree orb) and square natal Jupiter.
I dont do a lot of things some do.. girls slather on makeup or something or fall in various ways cause they’re insecure.. I have no impulse to do these things or conform that way.. but I do get gnawed by insecurity esp when I feel myself rejected or not getting some reaction out of people..