Some woman made a remark to me today; it was disturbing. I was not in a position to speak to her so I said nothing. She’s got a reputation as a total pain.
Ten minutes later, I wound up in the same room with her. This was unexpected. There were three of us there. I was talking to the man, who we both know. She joined the conversation, interrupting us in the process. I had deliberately turned my back to her.
“Blah, blah, you too,” she said, innocently. I didn’t exactly wheel around, but I did turn in a distinct fashion,
“What do you think you’re doing, coming up to me and telling me _________?” I said. “That’s not true. Why would you make a disturbing comment like that?
“I didn’t…” she went deny, but I wouldn’t let her.
“Yes, you did. That is exactly what you said to me and I didn’t appreciate it one bit. I don’t want you to ever say anything like that to me again. It’s a disgusting thing to say; if you feel the need to talk to people like that, it better not be me.”
She denied slightly, then apologized,
“I appreciate the apology, really I do. But please don’t speak to me like that again. It’s upsetting and if you do it again, I am going to confront you, just like this. I won’t let you speak to me like that. If that’s all you’ve got, don’t speak to me at all.”
I felt good about this. I would do it again in a heartbeat. It occurs to me, this is Saturn in Capricorn. Really, I can’t wait for this transit. There is such a thing as right and wrong. I can’t wait to see people with spines, stand up!
You?
I can’t wait either! ? I have my natal Saturn at 22 degrees of Capricorn. I also have my Mercury, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn. Boundaries are very important to me and I respect other people’s boundaries too.
My natal Saturn is at 22° as well in the second house. I am learning financial boundaries. AGAIN.
Been there and done that, a lot. But I’m a Capricorn in the 8th House…
Oh crap, that means I can’t just spit out whatever I want with my mouth!
You go girl;time to call a spade a spade,
Way to go, Elsa! She needed to hear it!
She’s well known to mess with people…all people. I understand she’s crazy, but I am facing way too much at this time, to be one of the people who attempts to tolerate her.
She’s going to get blunt force for as long as it takes. This is if she says anything inappropriate. If she wants to be normal, that’s fine.
Kind of like Eminem says in the song The Real Slim Shady only instead of slim shady please stand up it should read people with spines please stand up. Yep I agree I can’t wait either. Else you once wrote about how easily people are offended because they choose to be offended well I agreed with you then and still do. I get so tired of hearing about how this person or that is so offended.
…don’t even care right now it’ll be on my Mars/Asc & square my Saturn – I just want Saturn out of my 12th house.
Good for you! I have always admired that Mercury conjunct Mars, direct style of communication, that you possess and exercise!
I’m very well mannered but have no problem standing up for myself or anyone around me if there’s an asshole around. ?
Love this!
Good on you, Elsa! and you said it with aplomb.
Boundaries are hugely important, and if people don’t know where to draw the line, I’m not slow to remind them. Saturn in Capricorn natally, conjoined to Venus and Mars, with Aries Midheaven!
I can’t wait to see Saturn enter Capricorn. I’m almost rubbing my hands with glee. Time to get down!
I’ve been bad with boundaries before but have learned in the past few years. Feels so good to see where I could have gotten trampled and saved myself. Very satisfying.
Hope this lady backs off!
I have Mars in Cap, but so close to my 12th house that if you used another house system in my horoscope it would BE in the 12th house. Boundaries and me have a very … constricted history. When people say or do hurtful things to me, break my trust etc it hurts so deep (almost like a stone being thrown in the water without you noticing it) and later it comes up to the surface – and you can guess what’s happen then…. Yeah, I’m PISSED as good as they come, mixed up with resentment and everything in between. Yum! Good stuff. (Not).
So, if Saturn can improve my skills in setting these boundaries and rip off a few of the Neptunian/Piscean tendencies while he’s at it, I will SO look forward to it. But, Saturn being Saturn, I assume he will carry lessons before I will be able to fully assert myself in this regard. But boy, am I tired of being dumped, ditched and treated badly. (Martyr tendencies, Pisces energy is a bitch that way)
Hoo boy!
I wish I could speak like that.
It’s a great strength, and keeps shitheads out of the way.
Very powerful!
Thank you. I have been quite hurt by some of the mouths around me, recently. This is in real life, not online.
I’ve withdrawn to the fringe of life at this point:
https://elsaelsa.com/astrology/trying-to-find-my-way-back-to-the-margins/
But I’d like to wade back in, not too deep and not too often. In order to do this and not be harmed, I will have to defend against these mouths.
I have already committed to interrupting people…”Stop right there! I don’t want to hear your gossip…”
Or in other cases… “That’s enough. You’re talking about someone I love, so keep it to yourself. I will not stand her and listen to you badmouth people, ever again…”
If this gets rid of people, permanently, that’s fine. If they talk about me, that’s fine too. Because I know I’m of high quality. I don’t really want to deal with blind zombies anymore and frankly, I don’t think I have to.
That’s funny, I’m going in the direction of being more open and accepting. But my boundaries in the past have been air tight and it’s putting a wall up can gain some momentum for me where I end up very isolated. In my case I just tend to end up losing when I try to control others around me in the name of protecting my boundaries.
It’s brave! Good for you! Really liked that you manifested your point after her apology, probably much more effective.
I don’t consider myself spineless , but I’ve just opt out of difficult conversations when it has made me itch. Recently I’ve had no choice , conversations have either consisted of pure bs, or have been so politically charged that I’ve had to take a much more aggressive tone. I’m just not up for people’s negativity, it’s really draining.
Saturn will continue to transit my 12th and then hit my ascendant and 1st house. So it will be full-on exposure to some ongoing health issues and perhaps some resolutions. Saturn transiting Sag has had its moments. I am definitely more philosophical when I approach issues and problems.
Good. Some boundaries are sorely needed in this time of Neptune in Pisces where anything and everything goes and yet anything and everything’s somehow offensive. ?
You can’t have it both ways, peeps! ??♀️
Recently as I’ve been setting very firm boundaries it really seems to take hold and turn things around. There seems to be a lot of support for this now. Very transforming. And key is I’m setting the boundaries within myself as to what I will no longer accept or allow in my life.
And as Elsa touched on, sometimes this means pushing someone away or risking alienation. It’s worth it to me to take those risks. Long-term Saturn squaring Mars transit may be at work here, I can’t avoid asserting myself anymore and allow crap to continue.
YES!!!!
You are in the South and gossip goes hand in hand with it. That is part and parcel of small towns and it is everywhere. You’d have better luck at isolating yourself from other people than to get away from gossip about others. It is a way of life. Our family has the saying that if they are talking about you, they are letting someone else rest. And the husband’s family is if they don’t talk about you, you don’t exist to them. And half the time they will tell you to your face what they say behind your back.
All true, Tonya. All true.
Thank you! explains why I finally spoke a small piece of what I have been holding back. Change can 0nly happen sometimes when you are nasty like and extremely direct. :/ We will see what happens next for me!
I had one of these encounters today. No more puttin’ my pearls before swines. A prettied up apology won’t cut it for me. I have a life to live.
It’s three months later. I have had no interaction with this woman since this happened. I have not missed her for even one second.
There was another woman I pushed back about the same time. She no longer tries to engage me either. I can’t tell you how much better my life is! 🙂