Why is Lilith So Angry?

rejected womanAfter learning a bit about Lilith’s origins, how then are we to interpret her in a chart? There are many phases of the Lilith journey, but it almost always begins with a wound.

Drawing from the Kabbalistic tales, as well as the Alphabet of Ben Sira, we see that Lilith’s story begins happily. She is created and sees herself as a reflection of the beauty of creation, sharing equally in the joy and splendor of the garden. But she is soon disabused of this notion, with Adam demanding that she lay beneath him, and making it clear that she must always submit because she is fundamentally inferior to him. She tried to make her case that they were made from the same earth, created equally in the eyes of God, but he merely doubles down. Stricken, humiliated, and terrified, she cries out God’s ineffable name for help, and runs from the garden.

As she hid to nurse her wounds, she undoubtedly expected God to help her, to restore her place and enforce what seemed to be obvious justice. Instead, God sends three angels after her, and they meet her with threats. They don’t ask her what is wrong, or how she is feeling, or what can be done to restore peace and make things right. Instead, they tell her that is she does not go back, her children will be doomed to die. When that isn’t met with immediate submission, they also threaten to drown her in the sea. She, who fled from obvious injustice in hopes of safety and comfort, instead has her life threatened to get her to go back to a life of subjugation. The authorities, those who are meant to help and keep her safe, have failed her and traumatized her further.

Then she reacts as many in this situation do, and much as you would expect. In a fit of pain, she turns to self-abasement and rejects all that is good just as it has rejected her. She screams for the angels to leave her alone, and says that she was clearly created only to cause sickness and pain. She internalizes their judgement and becomes that which they fear and despise. She claims ownership of her life in the only way she knows how.

This story is heartbreaking. It’s also all too common even in today’s world. Even now, victims of all kinds of abuse, who are hurt, degraded, and dehumanized, often in their own homes, are treated terribly by authorities. They are grilled, doubted, retraumatized, and dismissed by the very people who are meant to help them. And many react in much the same way as Lilith. In cases of sexual abuse, it is common for survivors to become sexually promiscuous in order to reclaim that part of their lives on their own terms. They might also swing the other way, gaining weight, wearing baggy clothes, doing everything possible to become that which a potential aggressor would despise.

All of us start out innocent. All of us start out believing in the kind of world in which we belong, we are safe, and we are valued. And most of us, at a certain point, will be wounded by the world and devalued. And many of us will be further wounded by the very people who are tasked with helping us. It is in these moments that we become Lilith. Wherever she exists in our chart is where we should look first for that pain. While her story does eventually improve, providing a template for our own healing, our Lilith story almost always starts with raw, howling, wounded fury. And when we understand where it comes from, we can finally start to heal.

Do you have your own Lilith wound? Where is Lilith in your chart?

21 thoughts on “Why is Lilith So Angry?”

  1. Like Leo I think I have Lilith & Chiron natally conjunct in late Pisces which covers my 3rd house if siblings, immediate environment. In addition, I also have Saturn in Pisces. Yrs intense indeed! I am still dealing with wounding in that house. As one astrologer said, siblings are heavy in my chart….that was back in early 1990s!

  2. I’m not so convinced that Lilith is angry.

    To me Lilith is a type of raw dormant power that we are oblivious of its existence within … Lilith said no thanks to Adam, gave the middle finger to a bunch of middle “men” and said no to God … seriously, who does that?! But a brave warrior that is strong, fearless and steadfast in her beliefs and values. This is how I see Lilith. I don’t see her as angry, because to be angry is to be weak.

    History has unjustly succeeded in painting Lilith in the most negative light – an angry bitter woman cast aside and roaming the world with demonic vengeance …. nobody wants to be associated with that. Fear is a powerful tool. So as stories of Lilith’s darkness perpetuated for centuries, perhaps getting grimmer with time (word of mouth can be rather inaccurate and fanciful), the power in Lilith continued to lay dormant, almost invisible and possibly intentionally oppressed.

    What if she’s not angry? How would that change your perception of Lilith? Instead of distancing yourself from her, would you embrace her? Will we see her power more readily?

    These are questions I wonder ponder.

    BML/Lilith both make exact aspects to my personal planets, but since I don’t as yet have the “feels” for Lilith, I can’t hazard interpretations.

    Thank you, Lilith is very interesting. I also loved the historical associations.

    1. I absolutely disagree that being angry is to be weak. Sometimes that is when we find the most power…or at least the most motivation to take action. That is when lines are drawn, boundaries are either crossed or built, and shit can change. Lilith has been seen as this off-putting dark energy through history and maybe “angry” isn’t the most accurately specific word. I don’t think she was gleaming and smiling when she gave Adam and God the middle finger. Either way we both agree it is a raw dormant energy. She’s been repetitively rejected or ignored. I think recognizing her, regardless of how bleak her energy, might be the only way to embrace her. In my own chart, she sits in my 7th house. I am young, single, and way too much of a hopeless romantic. Literally just want a partner in life (libra moon as well). I was completely annoyed to find her here. However, the more I learn about Lilith, the more I am learning about how this placement for me holds both a wound and her dormant power. Acknowledging this wound definitely is changing how I proceed within my relationships.

      1. “I absolutely disagree that being angry is to be weak”. I thought that this was a very interesting opening statement, not that you disagree but rather …. the use of absolutely.

        Thinking and speaking in absolutes, can sometimes limit our growth, experiences and pose challenges particularly in one-on-one relationships. More so when preceding actions or the motivation to act. So maybe this is something to explore with Lilith in your 7th.

        1. I think that ignoring such an amazing and often misdirected emotion, such as anger, can also hinder one’s growth. Anger can bring weakness…but change, rebellion, and even wars have to start somewhere. That’s the vibe I get from Lilith – dealing with abuse and how you direct that dark energy. Midara has stated that Lilith’s true story is hard to pinpoint, but overall she is out-casted and uncomfortable to accept and understand. Perhaps this is something to explore as you attempt to gain “feels” for Lilith as she aspects your personal planets.

          1. t.Sun is exact square t.Lilith today, so this exchange/interaction is extremely fascinating to me.

            Given that t.Lilith is in Pisces (BML too, but not aspecting) in itself speaks volumes.. …..So, I hope you don’t or didn’t take offense to my comments; that’s really not what I intended.

            Fog is the mystery itself.

  3. I have Cancer Lilith in the 6th house. Chiron, Jupiter and my NN square it, but I really don’t know what all that means. I’ve read that a 6th house Lilith encounters problems at work, but I’m self-employed and have limited contact with my clients.

  4. Great article:)

    I have Lilith (I assume you are referring to BML?) on my Sun and Pluto in Libra. Oh and also MC.

    I see that the whole world has had been sexually abused. Or, maybe more aptly, had their sexuality abused.

    I think the people that wrote this story were too. How else could they have accessed this story? I have to look at the agenda of the people who came up with this ya know? I guess in a way, the story is the wound. Seeing through the bullshit of that story is the healing. Thats my experience:)

  5. “Suffering should make us angry. This type of anger moves us toward a wrathful compassion to take action to end suffering.” ~ HH Dalai Lama

  6. The Black Moon in Aries conjunct a 6 th house NN. Mars in leo on the Midheaven.
    All the power of those who seemed to wound me – became my power to create the life I want.

  7. Interesting historic and mythic perspective, Midara. Rereading it now brings to mind Robin Wall Kimmerer (citizen Potawatomi) who wrote something like growing up with a Creation Story like Adam and Eve … or Adam and Lilith, is a “raw deal” short-changed and … ever wounded. Kimmerer goes on to tell a different Creation Story; that of Sky Woman Falling.
    It matters so much the story we take in and grow our Tale Bone … No wonder Lilith was pissed off. I have her signature in my Natal 2nd House, learning that only after your posts. Unconscious undermined self-value. In my current Progressed Chart Lilith is in my 8th House conjoins my now Aquarius Sun. Perhaps having lived through the journey, surviving and learning Sky Woman has another version to feed my Tale Bone, Eve’s Tale Bone, Lilith and the Collective Liliths’Tale Bones (8th House)
    I’m inviting THAT story

  8. My Lilith makes a T-square with my Venus/Pluto opposition. Venus is in H9, Pluto H3 and Lilith H6.

    My sister (H3 Pluto) was extremely patronizing toward me and would regularly hurt my feelings with cutting words. My Mother would take my sisters side even though she knew my sister was in the wrong. It felt like she took pleasure in it, talk about injustice. This enraged me.

    1. My moms BML is conjunct her South Node, exactly inconjunct my Nodes. Her Venus and Mars oppose my BML with Mars opposing it by less than a degree. My mother’s Moon and sister’s Mercury are conjunct in Capricorn very near my BML. And my sister’s BML is conjunct my Mars.

      It’s interesting how Lilith has played out in our family dynamics. Even to this day, we cannot all three be around each other for more than one or two days at a time.

      And just by looking at our synastry, you might think my sister and I get along great. Her Venus and Mars are exactly conjunct my Sun/Moon and my Mars is exactly conjunct her Moon. Granted she is an Aquarius and her Sun is exactly on my 7th cusp and my Sun and Moon are exactly on her 7th cusp. … in our case “open enemies” is right.

      I think the t-square I have with BML is what really caused us not to get along. My mom’s involvement in our disputes and her taking my sisters side was really what hurt me the most. I felt more pain than rage, but rage did happen from time to time when I felt completely ganged up on. And the rage wasn’t so much toward my sister but you expect for a mother to be fair, you just expect that out of any mother, especially your own. I felt the injustice deeply and I think it damaged my self-esteem. (Saturn conjunction Pluto) I am still trying to come into my own. It did make me a fighter for my own child… I’ll always stick up for him if someone treats him unjustly.

  9. I really like the depth within the story of lilith and belive it would be rewarding to explore and nurture that aspect but have no idea where to start…BML vs. Lilith, whats the difference? Why is it two of them and how do I interpret them both?

  10. It was only recently I discovered my BML was in Capricorn, squaring my Moon. Both is in the 12th – my wound is hidden.

    When my progressed moon was in Cap from 2016-2018, I took a job in a global billion dollar company in a very conservative business. Saturn was probably on these exact same spots as well (haven’t tracked it).

    That company turned out to be a real BML relationship, as first their HQ then my boss and then even our HR rep acted out the unjustice from a corporate point. Vindictive, nasty women with power were hiding as frenemies there (probably the prog. Moon-stuff). I quit this November. Every one was quite surprised. It’s a business where people stay a lot of years. I gave them the middle finger after 1.5 years. It was almost blasphemy – but very satisfying!

    My wound is from misuse of male authority (my dad) and my feelings in the Libra Moon 8th house was deeply hurt.

    Today, my hackles rise every time there is a male in a positionoof power misusing his power against others. I have more than my share of difficulty with big, male CEOs who just thinks they own the world.

    What I discovered in this process was that I needed to be my own authority, my own power within my area to not feel powerless against male authorities. I needed to lay my own foundations, have my own place to act from and be strong from.
    I found a way to do that.

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